Saturday, December 19, 2009

Happy 11th Birthday Andre 12-19-98 and Happy 10th Gotcha Day 12-20-99

Here is my oldest baby at one year old maybe a month or two after we got home from Russia (we got home from Russia Dec 24, 1999 just in time to spend our first Christmas at home). I sit here amazed at the road we have traveled to get to this point. See I had 5 miscarriages a lot of poking, prodding, surgeries, shots, disappointment BUT God led us to this handsome little boy who needed a forever family. No matter what we went through it was so worth it to get to this sweet little guy.

See today 12-19-09 my sweet little boy turned 11 with a house full of friends and their families Sal, Samantha, Donavon, Sierra along with her younger sister and three brothers, Ben, Freddie, Hannah, Rebecka and of course his little sister Tara. I love to watch him play with his friends and hear them laugh and have a great time together.

Today we celebrated with cake and ice cream of his choice but when Andre turned one it was a different story. Andre was still in the orphanage when he turned one so we went to visit him but this time we snuck in with a banana for him to eat. Poor little guy had no clue what it was and the face he made was so funny but he wanted to keep trying to eat it though. He didn't know it but when we went back to our room we celebrated his birthday with a cake (even though it was bitter sweet because he wasn't with us yet) but that cake was the worst cake I had ever tried to eat in my life lol. That will teach us to celebrate without him there, right, lol. The sweetest celebration was when we finally got him home with us to MS and his Nana came for a visit, he finally had a taste of what a real cake was suppose to be and believe me he had it ALL over him the floor and chair the dogs loved him that day lol.

On 12-20-99 we went to court to adopt Andre and the judge gave her permission BUT not all of the paper work. We didn't know it until about 9:oo at night and Gerry and Mick had to go and get the paper that was missing off of the Orphanage Directors desk so we could get back to Moscow. That night was a terrible snow storm and when we finally got on the road we were the only ones out there and got pulled over by the police. Talk about a scary time but Suzanne explained we had to get back to Moscow and he let us go, thank God.

The ride back to Moscow was a scary one. See in Russia there are no gas stations every few exits like here in the states, actually there are none and there are no lights so it was dark, snowy and there were people wearing black coats and you couldn't see them until the last minute. But we made it back to Moscow safely with God's grace.

That first night was something. I had no clue what I was doing. I was the only one in the room with Andre and I sat my poor sweet baby on the bed, yes I said on the bed and left the room for a minute and heard thump, oh my goodness, right on the head he fell. Can you believe I didn't do it once but twice lol. Poor kid maybe he was better off being in the orphanage NO WAY he was better with us no matter what. I was so mad at Gerry for leaving me a lone with this sweet baby but he was running around Moscow doing things that needed to get done. So there I was with Andre and both of us sitting in our room crying together. I still can't believe how our first night went but we did get through it with two bumps and a live lol.

Andre's whole adoption process was unusual and difficult but so worth it. I can now sit here and see God's hand in the whole process and I can't thank Him enough for all he did to make sure this sweet little guy came home with us. God is so good even among all the pain of losing my babies He made sure His plan worked the way He wanted. I'll be honest I didn't see that at that time but now do and am thankful.

Andre, I pray that you know how much of a blessing you are to us and how much you are loved. No matter how old you get you will always be my baby boy that I prayed for and God heard my prayers. I might not have carried you in my tummy but I carried you in my heart and we picked you and you picked us and I am so grateful. I love you Happy 11th Birthday and Happy 10th Gotcha Day!

Monday, December 7, 2009

Birth Mother's to two amazing children God could ever give me....

I was out shopping at Khol's, when on my way home I was listening to the radio and there was a women who was talking about her birth mother. She said she was able to make contact with her through a letter. She just wanted to let her birth mother know that she appreciated what she did for her and that she was doing well and was blessed. She asked for the radio station to play Gentle Mary for her birth mother cause of the hard times she had to go through to make the decisions she had to make just like Mary did. So, there I was basically crying at how amazing her story was. There was no anger or hatred towards her birth mother. Even though the birth mother opted not to contact her back at this point she still feels blessed. God is so good and the women knows that what happened was met to be.

The funny thing is that I have been thinking about this subject for a very long time now, the birth parents of both my children. I know there is no way of ever finding them and thanking them for what they did, for the sacrifice they made for their children. I for one would so love to meet them and hug them and tell them thank you. Thank you for giving birth to my beautiful children. For giving me the chance to love their babies and watch them grow. What a sacrifice it had to be for them to decide to give them up. We have from day one told our children that their birth families loved them and the decision to give them up could not have been an easy one for them. So, my kids will come to me and say things like my mommy in China or my mom in Russia when they ask questions about them. It doesn't bother me cause I see these two women as brave, unselfish women who loved their babies very much. I give them so much credit. The love they had for them to know they couldn't take care of their babies. What an heart breaking decision that had to be.

Being an adoptive parent I have a heart for anyone who adopted or might be thinking about it. Even for the parents who have to decide if they can take care of their babies, what to do, they could abort but choose to do the right thing and give people like myself a chance to be a parent. See I am unable to carry a baby and it is heart breaking but in the end of all that pain I went through I would NOT change anything for the world. God made sure things worked out for the better even though I might not had seen that back then but now I know only too well. He had other plans for us. And I am so thankful to God for my children.

A while back I met a woman who had put up her baby for adoption at Khol's. I asked her a question about the size of something and told her that my daughter was tiny cause she was Asian. And she starting asking me questions. Next thing I knew she told me that she had a hard life and became pregnant and she put her baby up for adoption. I was shocked but as we talked more the story was amazing cause of the decision she had to make for her child to have a better life. As you all know I am an emotional person especially when it comes to adoption. I hugged this woman a complete stranger and told her how thankful those adoptive parents must be cause I only know too well how grateful I am. I thanked her on behalf of my children's birth parents. I told her I would never be able to thank them so I thanked her on behalf of all adoptive parents. What a sacrifice she made for the best of her child.

So, I just want to say THANK YOU to my children's birth parents. I love you cause you blessed me with these two beautiful kids. I am so thankful to the birth parent's and just hope and pray that they know that their babies are taken care of and loved unconditionally. I pray God gives them a piece of mind knowing their babies are OK.

I know my blog doesn't get read by too many people and that's OK. Maybe say a quick prayer for all birth parents. Maybe you know of someone who might be thinking of putting their baby up for adoption or know of an birth parent, give them my blog for them to read this. If I can help maybe one person to even understand what an adoptive parent feels maybe that person will have less pain in making a decision.